Walk A Mile In Her Shoes® Toronto 2010

Attention World:

You may recognize the fellow attached to this link as one of our awesome groomspeople... Amandeep has a quest and it is to rid the world of violence against women. To achieve such a mission he is approaching it one step at a time... in high heels! Click on the following link to check out Amandeep's mission and his goal of $1,000 (http://my.e2rm.com/personalPage.aspx?registrationID=918481&langPref=en-CA). Thanks everyone for any interest!

Jack and Jill Report: Meatball Blow Job Anyone? (Don't worry this doesn't get R rated...)

All Brandon and I can say is thank you, thank you, and thank you! On July 16th our fabulous collective of friends and family threw us a Jack and Jill extravaganza and needless to say it was one “hot” affair!

Ronda, Anna, Rick, and Tim... hopefully winning some big money! 

Thanks Bill for dealing cards!

With friends and family coming from places as remote as Barrie, Ontario (so far away!), as dangerous as Jane and Finch (hehehehe), and as deep south as Birmingham, Alabama, Brandon and I spent the night surrounded by a wonderful group of people who apparently care about us – who knew we were so lucky?!

We love you all!

The event kicked off at 8 p.m., with casino games, raffles, 50/50s, and most importantly drinks! Upon entry Immediately Brandon and I were handcuffed together by my lovely (cough) sister and we had to buy our way out of the cuffs… to do so we had to do any number of silly/embarrassing/sentimental/horrifying/death defying activities to buy our way out… some of the highlighted activities included: Brandon having to take his shirt off, the “truffle shuffle” (apparently you have to watch the Goonies to know what this is referring to), singing off key to Sonny and Cher, and the grand finale… (are you ready for this?) I had to give Brandon a “meatball blow job”. If children are reading this (or adults that are sensitive to horrifying acts performed with food) I would recommend skipping this section!

So you are probably wondering, what on earth is a “meatball blow job”? Don’t worry I was in the same boat, but as we were offered $40 to perform this “activity” it seemed worth our while to pursue the concept. Therefore, I shall now explain such a “novelty” so that others may (or may not) incorporate this into their lives.

Instruction Manual – Meatball Blow Job:

1. Have partner lie on back [Brandon was the partner in our case].

2. Have partner roll up shirt to expose belly button [are you gagging? giggling? or just grossed out?].

3. Kneel beside partner [I was the kneeler in our case].

4. Have third person place a hot, gooey, slimy, sauce covered meatball directly on partner’s belly button [have you thrown up yet?].

5. Lean over and eat said meatball out of partner’s belly button [OMG!].

6. Sit back chewing (it may burn a little) and wonder if you will ever be the same again [I wasn’t, nor will be…].

Once I had recovered from such a “wondrous” experience it was time for other antics … as the room was about the same temperature as the sun (or perhaps 1-2 degrees hotter) a table fan was auctioned off to our “steamy” crowd… frankly I would have paid any amount of money for it at that point, but it seemed a little selfish. The Shaw Clan (Paul, Leslie, Murray, and Meri-Lynn) won the fan and were able to cool down their surroundings slightly. I on the other hand was ready to fling myself into a vat of ice cream to cool down… mind you I would normally be willing to do that!

Mike and Amandeep - Amandeep you look happy!

Another highlighted event was the “pie-ing” of Brandon, Lanny, and I… pies were auctioned off for each of us (to the highest bidder) and then thrown in our faces – to add insult to injury ;-)… Lanny was pied by my cousin Julien who demonstrated she has an arm fit for Major League Baseball (the splatter was humongous!), I was pied by Lanny (perhaps he was bitter about his own pie-ing experience?), and lastly Brandon was pied by the one, the only, Faye. After having spent a large amount of Brandon’s teenage and twenties semi-living with him and his brother, Faye had a lot of pent up “excitement” that needed to be executed onto Brandon’s face… and so she did and may I say, she did it well.

Two other great fundraisers for the evening were the selling of “real-estate” space on a pair of boxers for Brandon to wear under his kilt (HE WILL BE WEARING SOMETHING – YEAH!)… different regions of the pair were sold for different prices and let me tell you there are some rather exciting and concerning comments provided… I think rulers and directional arrows were involved...

Elizabeth displaying Brandon's wedding under kilt wear...

Another intriguing fundraiser was a simple that led to hilarious results… a jar filled with Hershey’s Kisses was raffled off and my Aunt Donna was the lucky winner… for which Brandon provided her with a rather energetic dance (it was mildly creepy for me, but entertaining as all get out for everyone else). I think Aunt Donna will never be the same again!

As the fun-filled night drew to a close, prizes were raffled off and the final prize (a massive Texas Mickey of scotch) was won by the piper for our wedding – Denise (could there have been anyone more fitting?).

I was going to write out the list of people that need to be thanked, but out of sheer fear of forgetting someone I will just say:

Thank you to our wonderful family, friends, and co-workers who joined us for the evening, laughed with us, laughed at us, flew across North America to be there, took pictures, dealt cards, jumped in out of the blue and ensured the 50/50s were a success, prepared food, tended bar, organized the evening, and/or contributed in someway shape and/or form to the event. It was a wonderful experience that Brandon and I will remember for the rest of our lives. We love you all and you have each contributed to making a special night and our wedding that much more meaningful… and of course introducing to the world for the first time ever: THE MEATBALL BLOW JOB!

PS... I would like to say a special thank you to Tamara Kaye of Instyle Weddings and Decor who decorated the hall for us - she did a beautiful job in sage and ivory and to be honest it made the whole event look beautiful!  Thank you Tamara - as per usual you are wonderful.

Jack and Jill... July 16, 2010

My wedding party is amazing... have I mentioned that?  They absolutely have gone above and beyond the call of duty to ensure that Brandon and I have the best day possible.  In addition to helping and supporting us on our big day they are throwing us what I imagine can best be described as the most amazing, fantastic, incredible, stupendous, exciting, joyous, fun-filled Jack and Jill... EVER!  The big night is set for July 16 at 8pm in Oshawa.  The main details are a secret from Brandon and I, but I can say if you are interested please e-mail my awesome sister (Megan) at meganwjc@hotmail.com. 

Brandon and I are both 100% committed to doing anything and everything people ask in order to provide a highly entertaining evening for everyone that attends... (if that means ending up covered in pie, syrup, beer, we're good with it!).  We are in this for fun (off kilter or not) and we really want a whole gang of our friends, family (heck strangers!) to come and enjoy the night. 

My lovely Unit!  Thanks Ladies for all your work!

Now apparently not everyone knows what a Jack and Jill is so for those who are still learning I shall now provide a quick explanation:

If you Wikipedia "Jack and Jill" (also called "stag and doe") you will see that this is by and large a tradition primarily based out of Canada and the United Kingdom - but is especially popular in Southern Ontario.  Basically the purpose is to raise money for the engaged couple (can I say yeah!?!).  The fundraising is done via ticket sales, a cash bar, and/or games played that put the happy couple in hilarious positions.  For more information please visit: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stag_and_doe.  

See I told you it was a little "off kilter"

Brandon with a few of his fantastic grooms"people"

PS The door prize for the evening is a Toronto Harbour Front Cruise Dinner for 2 (valued at $270!) - you don't even have to attend, just buy a ticket... see I told you the wedding party is amazing!

From my head to my toes I am almost ready to go...

What a day! Okay, okay, I have previously managed to "complain" about the Internet and all the "negatives" it can bring to the average bride... predominately the availability of a never ending supply of ideas that are somewhat unobtainable, but tonight I am going to take a different approach, I am going to applaud the Internet.


So here's the deal... I have had difficulty deciding on a number of items that are kind of critical for the whole getting married process... predominately the item or items that will go on my head and the items that will go on my feet on the 18th day of September (AKA W Day).

Practicing to be a bride... Toronto Bridal Show 2009 

I have been indecisive for a number of reasons, the first being that 4 and a 1/2 inch heels are the fashion of the day and frankly if I am going to be wearing them for somewhere in the neighbourhood of one million hours I don't think it would be a good idea to have stilts on.  The second reason for my indecisiveness is that I am Scottish (read: cheap), and don't feel it is reasonable to pay 1 trillion dollars for a piece of tulle and sequins... Therefore, the search has been on, and in true Marie-ish fashion I have been searching and driving my family, my friends, and my fiancé, a "triple F moment" if there has ever been one, insane.


Therefore I am thrilled to say that as of this moment my shoes and my "head gear" are currently winging their way (driving, sailing, being carried by a messenger pigeon...) to my waiting arms. The ridiculous thing is I am not normally this "wacked" about choosing shoes (etc...), in fact I am typically quite chill about this topic (or at least I like to think so...), but I really struggled finding something that worked.

You like???

Therefore, I scoured a number of bridal stores and then turned to the Internet. I have to thank my Unit member Lorraine for being such a great source of advice, and encouraging me to look online. At first I was really nervous about ordering what I consider pretty important items from virtually unknown entities, but now I am 100% in support. My shoes I ordered off www.zappos.com and I have to say the service was absolutely amazing. I called both the Canada 1-800 number and the USA 1-800 number with questions and the service was awesome from both.


So tonight when I got home I was $/"&*%? bent on getting my shoes ordered; I was no longer willing to mess around.  I signed onto the Internet did some Googling and made my decision. However, because of the fact that I needed the shoes ASAP to have my dress altered (Thursday!) I was in a bit of a bind to get them here on time. Therefore I ordered them from Zappos USA tonight and I am impressed to say that they will arrive in Alabama Monday morning.... I am sure you are asking, why Alabama? From there Mary (who lives in Alabama, and is also one of my favourite people) will bring them with her when she travels north of the 49th Parallel on Wednesday and I will have them by Wednesday night (yeah!).

Still practicing... too princess-like?

My veil was another piece of discussion as I really found it hard to look for it before I retrieved my dress from Pennsylvania. Not that I couldn't remember what the dress looked like, but it seemed so far off I couldn't mentally absorb both ideas without them being in the same country. However, waiting till the dress arrived in Canada was problematic as it gave me a limited amount of time to get the whole "look" together. And despite traversing a number of bridal stores (thanks Mom, Megs, and Mallory) to trawling through umpteen gazillion websites (thanks Lorraine) it was difficult for me to imagine what the whole "look" would be. The turning point was when I found a website that sent free samples to locales in the USA (thanks again Mary for being my carrier pigeon ;-). The samples I received allowed me to compare them to my dress and make the best choice (I think!) possible.


I cannot wait for everything to arrive... getting mail is always fun, but let's face it this will be better than ever! 2 months people - 2 months!

Dancing Queen, Bridesmaid Dresses, THE TASTING!, and a Place to Call Home...

Dresses, dresses, and more dresses... as you can tell my brain has been on dresses as of late. Once my wedding dress was secure and safely back in the country it was time for the arrival of my bridesmaids’ dresses!

Out to dinner after picking up the lovely dresses!

I was so excited to see them... it is a strange situation picking out dresses for four different people - it was especially complicated because I couldn't see the final product in the colour I had chosen until they arrived - a fact that drives me insane (can't be that far off I am pretty close to nuts already!). While I am still unable to describe the dress I chose, I will say they are beautiful and are safe and sound in Whitby. Thus far I have loved seeing each of my lovely Unit members in them and cannot wait to see the final product when they are standing beside me on September 18, 2010.

Another activity that has put me in the "wedding" mood was going to see Mamma Mia (http://www.mamma-mia.com/) with Brandon, Megan, and Amandeep... there is nothing better than a little ABBA to get you feeling excited for nuptials. The show was fantastic and I will admit (probably to Brandon's chagrin!) that we held hands during the wedding scene and it made the fact our big day is approaching and will be here before we know it that much more exciting.

A day on the farm... isn't he cute???

The next exciting thing on the agenda as of late is that we went to Royal Ashburn (http://www.royalashburngolfclub.com/the_perfect_setting.php) for the tasting!  The food was amazing and we had such a good time - of course we would have a good time as it equalled non-stop eating and selection being brought continuously before you!  It was very difficult to choose the options (especially the soup course - who knew?), but we finally succeeded and we are really happy with it.  The easiest choice in the end was dessert (so yummy!).  I can't wait!  I just hope I have time to eat (LOL) - I guess there are some bonuses to being diabetic - guaranteed food supply.

Gotta love family - Tasting at Royal Ashburn

Lastly the biggest news for Brandon and I is that we found a place to live!  We are moving to the T-Dot.  It is a big change, but look at it this way... we are not ending up living in my parents' basement, which realistically if we didn't find something... kidding Mom!  We are pumped about the new place and are able to take possession in the middle of the month... well Brandon moves in to the apartment in July, I will follow in September, but that is neither here nor there.  The building is from the 1930s and there is an amazing "old school" elevator - it is just perfect for us!  We can't wait.

Am I really going to be living with that?

Well I think I have finally caught up on all the tales of the last few weeks.  That means I can return to my regular full out rambling blogs (yes please don't cry with excitement!).  I hope everyone had a wonderful Canada Day!  80 Days People!

Swimming in the Pool of Weddings

Blub, blub, tablecloths, blub, blub, registry, blub, blub, taxes...

I have to say that it always amazes me how when one starts planning a wedding the thinking never stops. For instance I have spent the one million days that have passed since Brandon proposed trying to pick colours for the wedding. Yes I know I have ordered bridesmaid dresses and the invitation paper, but the fact is that I am finding the actual decor colour scheme difficult to develop as a result of, well, everything! (Scottish may seem cool, but it adds a special layer of complexity to the situation).

Therefore, when I went with my lovely entourage (AKA: the Fiancé, the MOH, and the Queen Mum) up to Royal Ashburn to pick out table cloths for the day I felt a little overwhelmed with colour... it was everywhere and nowhere all at the same time. We were met at Ashburn by my lovely wedding planner (who had a Scottish wedding herself) and were offered a number of choices all of which would be perfect. In some ways I felt like a kindergartener and wanted to pick one of everything.

As the true spaze I am we debated everything (and are still working on completely crystallizing the ideas), however what impressed me the most was how supportive and understanding everyone was and not once did anyone suggest I would do better in a mental institution or perhaps as the "poop scooper" in a three ring circus - you know the job I am talking about... the dude/chick with the backwards hat following the parade of elephants around with an extra large shovel, known as "the" shovel (sorry folks not for home use, as they are only available via special order and not from Canadian Tire, Wal-Mart or Zellers).

Therefore the debate... do I choose green? chocolate? champagne? buttercup yellow? electric blue? dogwood rose? jazzberry jam? well you get the point... (Don’t worry electric blue is not really an option! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_colors). Well the verdict has been reached, but only as a result of a huge expenditure of brain power on my part... sigh... this is where the blub, blub, blubbing starts.

Now with tablecloths planted firmly in my past (thank God), I have turned my attention to registering. DISCLAIMER: I WOULD LIKE TO STATE NOW THAT I DON`T EXPECT GIFTS, I ONLY WANT TO SHARE BRANDON AND MY BIG DAY WITH OUR CLOSEST LOVED ONES. PLEASE DO NOT FEEL YOU NEED TO BUY FROM THE REGISTRY THIS IS JUST ME EXPLAINING MY TALE... In order to avoid the appearance of asking for gifts I am not going to use the stores' names in this discussion; instead I am going to refer to the first store we registered at as “Regina Phalange” (I miss Friends) and the second as “Tom, Dick and Harry”.

Never having been married or had a baby before I have never registered, hence why this was a bit of a learning experience... We went to Regina Phalange and met with the staff member assigned to the registry area... then we were turned loose with a scanner and a never ending time frame. Frankly I think Brandon became blinded by the light of Regina Phalange’s “electronics’ department”, as his top priority was to scan a number shiny objects (aka televisions) and a few lazy boy recliners... once I got that out of Brandon’s system and suggested that perhaps we would do better with a few gifts geared towards actually living in our future residence (aka sheets, towels, dishes) we really got down to business.

Our second stop was Tom, Dick and Harry. This store was not as much fun as Regina Phalange as I feel that it did not have enough to offer and the quality just wasn’t there. However, we finished off the items on our list, but we still had one more stop...

While Tom, Dick and Harry and Regina Phalange proved to be interesting experiences, Brandon and I found the Oshawa Regina Phalange rather lacking and decided we would be better off hitting the downtown location... and the only thing that can be said is WOW! And as a result we are now done the whole “registering process” with the minor exception that we have a king sized duvet registered with a queen sized duvet cover, but the way I look at it marriage is a work in progress... blub.

The final topic that I am swimming in as we tick down the days till the wedding (198 and counting!) is the HST. This is a problem because we clarified with all of our vendors when we signed the contract the impact the HST would have on our cost, but when it came down to it not all of them respected our contracts. Therefore, blub, I have been spending the last few weeks, blub, trying to sort out this mess and fight the “good” fight, blub. I will explain the whole saga when it comes time to pass, but for now let me say that it is drama ridden at best.

Did anyone note my mention of 198 days and counting? We have entered a new century of pre-wedding bliss and I cannot wait for the days to tick away. As such I want to take this moment and thank both our families for all they do for each of us every day. For example without my MOH, I would be lost (she is my hero after all).

WE ARE GETTING MARRIED!!!

I'll Have Gray-Asparagus With That...

Dresses, dresses and more dresses... what a difficult thing for a bride to decide. First the bride has to pick out her wedding gown, which can be a difficult task all on its own, but then she has to pick something for 1 or more of her closest female (or male) friends to wear - first focusing on the colour, then the length (i.e. long, cocktail, tea length, or hooker), then the neck line (or no neck line as the case may be), and then, and then, and then... at some juncture the whole process becomes a little overwhelming and the bride begins playing a mental game of Bridesmaid Survivor... or rather Bridal Survivor (do I really want to get married if it means having to search and search for a dress that will keep everyone happy and I may potentially hate?). Therefore, setting out to find a dress for my lovely Unit was a little more difficult then I originally anticipated.

Lunch with Carter and the Unit... He Fits Right In!

Frankly if I were to lay blame for my stress it would be best to be honest right up front and say I made a mistake immediately: I left myself too open to suggestions from others, and as I am a person who wants to make everyone happy this is a dangerous situation. As the Guys and Doll(s) of our wedding party are all wearing kilts for the big day I didn't want the girls wearing short dresses as frankly I felt we had enough leg on display already. However, it is tricky in the year 2010 to ask your bridal party to wear matching dresses, let alone full length gowns. Therefore, I began to stress and stress and stress about pushing for long dresses... who knew it was so hard to find something that worked with the theme? and when did all the cocktail dresses become so... cough... night-club-esque? (Man I am starting to sound twice my age!).

We're Still Celebrating the Whole Carter Being Born Thing...

After going out with the ladies to look at dresses I finally stated loud and clear that short was out. I felt terrible and this was my second mistake: feeling terrible. I think one of the things that is easy to happen when you are getting married is to get lost in the chaos and try to please everyone (because sometimes it is just easier). I had spun myself into circles trying to come up with a solution that I would be good with, but at the end of the day your gut always knows and my gut knew I wouldn't be happy unless the dresses were long.

Bridal Branial Breakdown is a disease that I am starting to suffer from (yes I made this term up myself and I personally feel it is going to be Legend (wait for it) ary – sorry I have been watching way too my How I Met Your Mother lately and am starting to talk like Barney; before long I am going to be telling people to "suit up" and referring to myself in the third person as "awesome"). Bridal Branial Breakdown, or Triple B as I like to refer to it occurs when the bride begins to over think things too much (i.e. bridesmaid dresses) and her brain starts to smoke (pouring out of her ears predominately, but nose is also an option if the condition escalates), and then her eyes start to water (looking suspiciously like tears) and then her head starts to play music (very much like bongo drums) and from there, well, from there the situation just escalates. Candidly, if you had asked me two years ago whether I would care how long the dresses were I would of said, "Do I care if they even wear dresses? Pants or a skirt would work"… funny what an engagement ring + a year and a half of planning + a looming wedding date does to a gal's brain? The Bridal Branial Breakdown gets em every time!

Okay, so once the length decision was made, the colour had to be selected, but the colour, oh the colour! How many shades of green are there? One million? Green can come in shades ranging from grass, to kiwi, to celadon (what the $%^&@# is celadon?), to sage, to mint green, to sea foam, to hunter, to army green, to asparagus, to British racing green (maybe for a car, not for a dress!), to chartreuse, to fern green, to gray-asparagus, to honeydew, to olive, to Sacramento State green, to shamrock… well you get my point (and by the way could someone please explain to me who came up with the term "gray-asparagus green" – what the heck kind of asparagus were they eating?)... before we go any further I need to pause here as my brain needs a break, I was beginning to feel like Bubba from Forest Gump for a second… okay now I am focused again, where was I? Right Dresses!

I didn't pick this one!

Colour may seem simple, in fact it should be, but yet again you have to worry about what people will be willing to wear, skin tone, hair colour, and, and, AND! For instance I have spent my whole life dreaming of having sage green bridesmaid dresses, however when it came to pass I made my third mistake: I wasn't insistent enough on the colour… who knew sage wouldn't be loved by all? In the end the dresses are not going to be sage (it is a secret, because, well, some things have to be a secret for the big day), but it wasn't because of public opinion, the choice was all mine and frankly because my Unit is about as dedicated as dedicated can be they probably would have been willing to wear burlap sacks if I had asked nicely enough and added a cherry on top to sweeten the deal, so no one fret that perhaps I have chosen something that doesn't make me happy.

Photoshop Rocks!  Can't Give the Secret Away! 

My Lovely Unit

In the end I survived, and we ended up with what I consider the most beautiful bridesmaid dress in the world. It didn't take until closing time and we are all in one piece! I am so excited to see my beautiful Unit dressed in their finery on my wedding day (214 days and counting!) that I am practically bouncing off of the chair right now! Thanks ladies for dealing with my indecisiveness (it was only because I wanted you to look beautiful), but know one thing for sure, I definitely didn't make a mistake choosing y'all to stand by me for our big day (even if I occasionally develop a severe case of the Triple B)!

Cakes and Kilts... What More Could a Girl Ask For?

Wow there is less than eight months until the big day; time has flown so fast! January has been jammed packed with wedding activities and the excitement is building. The last two weeks have seen us take care of ordering the cake, the lads (going for the Scottish thing) getting sized for kilts, and my Lassie’s (AKA the Unit) picking their bridesmaid dresses!

And the journey begins! 

Doesn't he look cute?... confused about his apparel, but cute!

For Brandon and I cake is not the most important part. It is obviously a key to the whole day (you have to have something to shove in your new spouse’s face), but for us a wedding is not defined by cake... however... there are some that would disagree and by that standard we still have to choose a wedding cake that is edible and at least goes with the whole wedding motif we have tried to create.

Enter Aunt Audrey’s Cakes (for more information please visit:
http://auntaudreyscakes.com/)... and may I say YUM! Instead of being a lack lustre experience I completely enjoyed the cake sampling and the cake design we chose. This is where I have to give a shout out to Brandon for his fantastic ability to understand food; he has this incredible knack for mixing the right sauces, spices, carbs, proteins and vegetables into the tastiest mixtures one has ever tasted! In fact I have been known refer to Brandon as the king of Subway as without fail we can stand in line at Subway right beside each other and put the exact same ingredients on a sub, but every time (EVERY SINGLE TIME) Brandon’s sub ends up being 1000% better than mine (amazing but true). He actually might be the eighth wonder of the food world... Anyway, back to the cake...

Landon... Booyah!

I don’t want to ruin the surprise, so I will leave it that we chose a lovely cake and I am completely pumped to have what appears to be a lovely food item to shove in Brandon’s face (mwhahaha, mwhahaha)... well, not really... this is where I have to be honest... I am not into the whole cake in the face thing... in fact it kind of disturbs me and as the resident diabetic in the relationship I feel shoving a pile of sugar in my face (even if it misses my mouth) is just bad mojo for the day – sugar is evil stuff and I wouldn’t put it past it to try to absorb through my skin into my blood stream and send me on a high that no legal or illegal drug could produce. I am explaining this right now so no one thinks I am being a stick in the mud on the big day... I am just being practical... we all know how my luck works and if it wasn’t a crazy high blood sugar as a result of my face being caked it would be my uncanny ability to somehow get icing in my eye and end up blind... therefore, it is just better to avoid, avoid, avoid.

I think someone finds something funny!

The next wedding event that transpired was something that both Brandon and I have been eagerly anticipating for months – the kilts! We can’t call ourselves off kilter if we don’t have kilts! Therefore, on a sunny day in January we went to the Scottish Company at Leslie and the 401 and were sized... now frankly I am going to try to do my best to explain, but the pictures will have to do most of the talking because frankly it was so much fun to see.

Sue you cannot hide from the camera!

One big topic during the course of the fitting was the to wear underwear or not debate... this has been a critical debate for months and one that I personally feel is open, shut... and covered! The gentleman who fitted the guys and doll(s) pointed one important fact out to the troop and that was... THESE ARE RENTED KILTS and perhaps you won’t want to share space quite that way. Therefore, the jury is still out, but I am thinking with arguments like that it won’t be that much longer until a clear distinction is made.

I'm not sure about the shoes Deep, but you look pretty darn good in a kilt!

In addition to Brandon’s gang we had two younger visitors with us: Carter (remember him? he was just born not that long ago) and Brandon’s niece Alyssa (absolutely adorable young lady). It was great to have them along for the ride and frankly they work well in pictures!

(Left to Right)

Mom practicing her baby holding techniques on Carter

It looks like Brandon is kidnapping Alyssa away... Run Alyssa, Run!

Okay, okay, that is probably enough for tonight, but that leaves the tale about bridesmaid dresses for next time! Therefore, stay tuned and while I think these jokes are mildly tasteless those who are anti-kilt will probably get a chuckle and occasionally I have to provide you folks and outlet for your unkiltsmanlike opinions (and the guys and doll(s) of Brandon’s gang a few options for comebacks on the wedding day... ummmm Sue I don’t know what you are going to say, but we’ll work on it)!

(Left to Right) Suzie Q and Terry Too... My parents and me... I am so lucky! 

Therefore, a few responses to the question: What do you wear under your kilt?

1. Nothing is worn, in fact everything is in good working order!
2. My mother once told me a decent lady wouldn’t ask, God bless ’er she was right!

3. On a good day lipstick (okay that one is inappropriate, but I laughed really hard)!

4. My shoes and socks!

5. Ahhh lass I am a man of few words... (and one can imagine where that ends!)

6. My Scottish Pride!
(For more information on jokes that will tickle your sporran please visit: http://hubpages.com/hub/thejockspot_UP_YOUR_KILT and/or http://www.realmenwearkilts.net/what.html)  

PS I didn't want to give away any "real" pictures of the kilts since I figure that should be a surprise.  However, I will let you know that the tartan is Scottish National and the whole kilt fitting was one of my favourite parts so far!

Canadian Cold Feet?

So I got a little distracted from my happy tales of pre-marital bliss... and had to express my discontent (I will keep all posted on whether I receive an apology). HOWEVER, it is time I return to my blathering on about my wedding (which is getting CLOSER!).


Now as I have been trying to finish recapping December to make it look like I actively thought about the wedding that month, I have a few more tales to share and then I think I am caught up to date. This is a good thing as starting Friday the next few weeks are going to be nuts! First comes cake, then comes kilts, then comes a million other things (I think I am most excited about the kilts)!

I guess the biggest thing I have to explain is that as of late I have been having a serious case of cold feet. Now I know you are thinking this is an awkward way of telling Brandon that something's wrong, but don't worry my cold feet have had absolutely nothing to do with him... The first instance occurred when Megan and I went to the Torch Relay at Nathan Phillips Square. It was so exciting to see the Olympic Flame be brought into Toronto; it made me feel like I was actually a part of the Olympic experience even though the Games are happening so far away. However, no matter how much I was warmed by the spirit of being Canadian, I can easily say that the Torch Ceremony was absolutely one of the coldest experiences of my life. Seriously! Three days later I still wasn't sure if I had left my left foot behind... and specifically there is a toe that was really missing - it was an important one... it really gave definition to my foot.

True Canadian Spirit - I don't know if I was made for this though!

The second instance wasn't so joyous, nor a laughing matter. However, the overall feeling of being Canadian was there despite the reason for the gathering. My second instance of cold feet occurred when Dad, Megan and I went to watch the soldiers being brought home from across the Highway of Heroes from our vantage point on the Henry St. Overpass. In this situation I swear I nearly lost a foot to the cold, but I have to say that my pathetic complaints are nothing compared to what some have given/lost and I want to say thank you to the four soldiers and their families.

At any rate, despite the severe cases of cold feet I have been experiencing as of late I am proud to report that the only sign of cold feet thus far has been environmentally induced as opposed to romantically/mentally (are you breathing Brandon?).

A few days after the Torch Relay (AKA the coldest experience of my life) another exciting moment happened... my cousin Janessa and her boyfriend Jesse got engaged! Brandon and I are both thrilled for them and excited that there is another wedding on the horizon. I have to say the moment I found out was incredibly exciting because Janessa said she had news for me and I had grabbed her hand... and I felt the ring (PS it is beautiful!) and we started jumping up and down. It was all rather fantastic. Congrats guys and we can't wait to watch you go through your whole wedding planning experience.

How Cool Is This?  (No really how cold is this!?)

Okay so this is a short blog... as promised (miracles do happen). I will have another instalment this weekend as tomorrow we are going to the bakery to talk "cake" and then Saturday is Kilt Day... I will keep y'all posted and I can't wait to tell everyone how "off kilter" our kilt experience turns out to be!

An "Off Kilter" Experience: The Holiday Inn Express in Whitby, Ontario

As I am getting married this year (September 18, 2010) I need to book a large quantity of hotel rooms for my guests to stay in and like any other bride I made a couple of appointments to check out my options (please let's remember I am Scottish [READ: cheap]).

The second of the two appointments I booked was for January 3, 2010 (3pm) at the HOLIDAY INN EXPRESS in WHITBY, ONTARIO.  Hating being late we, (my parents, my sister and I) arrived at the hotel right on time. Among other pieces of information I hoped to find out, I wanted to ensure that the honeymoon suite was what my fiancé and I were looking for.

Upon entering the hotel (FYI The hotel was HOLIDAY INN EXPRESS in WHITBY, ONTARIO) I immediately walked up to the front desk and introduced myself (please note I had been advised that anyone could take me around the hotel and that it would be their "pleasure"). The employee rudely told me that the “Presidential (AKA Honeymoon) Suite” was dirty and had not been cleaned, nor would it be cleaned for the rest of the day as they were short on cleaning staff (Bottom Line: we could not see the room). Upon inquiring if this was a regular occurrence it was suggested that the hotel was typically short of cleaning staff. Additionally no offer was made for us to see the rest of the hotel, no apology was offered and basically we were dismissed completely out of hand.

This really frustrated me for a number of reasons: 1) as the appointment was at 3pm (their specified time) my entire day off (as it was a Sunday) had to be structured around this time, 2) I was insulted because I felt the employee treated me with complete disregard and open rudeness, and 3) I do not know what the common cleaning practices of hotel chains are (don't know if I want to...), but the impression I was left with was that it was undetermined when the room would be cleaned and that seems unhygienic at best.

After stewing over the issue I called the hotel (just in case you can’t remember the name it was THE HOLIDAY INN EXPRESS in WHITBY, ONTARIO) on Monday January 4, 2010 and asked to speak to the general manager. I was informed there was no general manager for the hotel, but that the Guest Services Manager (GSM) would be able to assist me.

The GSM (Rosie) came on the line, apologized for the inconvenience I had experienced and invited me to come back to the hotel and “try again”. However, before we set a date for us to come back she informed me that the room was STILL NOT CLEAN, nor would it be cleaned until the following day (over 48 hours in case you are not keeping track). Disappointed by the situation (and concerned about the hotel’s cleaning practices) I agreed to come in on January 6, 2010 to view the room and have a tour of the hotel. In the event that the room was booked she was to call me and let me know so that I didn’t waste my time. I was also given the name of the hotel staff member that would assist me at 7pm and the guarantee that I would be taken care of.

On January 6, 2010 my family, my fiancé, and I went to the HOLIDAY INN EXPRESS in WHITBY, ONTARIO for the second time that week to view the room. Upon entering we were greeted by a staff member who went to get the employee that was to assist us. When the employee walked out (clearly confused) I introduced myself and it was immediately clear she had no idea about the appointment and admitted as much. Accordingly I explained what we were looking for and was told that the room had been given as an upgrade to one the “Priority Rewards” Members and we would not be able to view the space.

In the end she did take us on a tour, but everything seemed poorly kept and the Jacuzzi tube in one of the rooms looked questionable at best and frankly the whole experience left a dissatisfying taste in our mouths.

This whole experience was juxtaposed by the fantastic experience we had when we went to visit the hotel directly next door to the HOLIDAY INN EXPRESS in WHITBY, ONTARIO – the Marriott Residence Inn. The Inn provided us with an excellent tour, lots of helpful answers and information and looked remarkably clean (mind you, comparatively to the Holiday Inn it may not have taken that much!).

Therefore, it is easy to make my decision as to which hotel chain to use, obviously one hotel wants my business and the other one has zero interest or commitment to ensure guest satisfaction, quality and making the effort out to make my wedding just that little bit better. Seriously why would I want to stick my family and friends into rooms of a questionable cleaning status and force them to deal with rude staff?  Talk about being a little "off kilter"!

Frankly, as a side note to the HOLIDAY INN EXPRESS in WHITBY, ONTARIO I am disappointed and frustrated and I feel you owe me an apology. Thank you for wasting my time, but I do appreciate you making my decision that much easier as now I know that I want to stay at the Marriott Residence Inn – with wedding bells on in fact!

PS: I am a little annoyed (if you haven't guessed... so I did something I've never done before - I made a YouTube Video and e-mailed it to the Holiday Inn... you know just to get their thoughts on the whole situation as clearly phone calls don't work (did I mention that I tried calling back to complain and it disconnected?)... Originally I was going to use clay and make figures for the video and act the whole thing out, but when I realized that might be going a little far I just decided to give my verbal account... make sure to visit the link so the Holiday Inn recognizes that people are interested and it is time for customer service to take the driver's seat... instead of a back seat to commercialism, staff cuts, and simply poor quality overall (quantity isn't everything).

YouTube Link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qeJyjrg1pkg (If you have "issues" watching this video click on the "HQ" button in the right hand corner of the video screen)

Marie and Brandon Present: Guys and Dolls... (Please Picture Brandon Being Part of a Chorus Line Here)

Okay, okay, I know I haven’t spent any time introducing Brandon’s crew – despite my continuous promises to do so. Please don’t blame me, but things keep happening and I end up veering off of my intended topic. Therefore, before anything else happens (i.e. something shiny catches my eye) I would like to take this time to properly introduce the groomsmen...

Brandon may kill me for this reference, in fact as I write this I am beginning to worry he may kill himself, but I lean toward calling the group of groomsmen “Guys and Doll(s)” [ASIDE: Sorry Brandon for my need to use musical theatre to describe your group, but it is the only thing that keeps popping into my head... it makes me wonder if instead of being “Off Kilter” we are "Off Broadway ] (For more information on Guys and Dolls please visit: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Guys_and_Dolls). Despite the reference, I hope we don’t have any gangsters, drunks and/or crooks in the troop, but a friend is a friend and we will love the groomsmen no matter what “indiscretions” they may bring to the table.

The Days Before Amandeep...

(Left to Right) Jason, Lanny, Brandon and Sue

You are probably sitting there reading this blog more confused about my reference than during my crazy “Batman” kick of a few months ago, however the explanation is simple as in our true “off-kilter” fashion the gang of groomsmen consists of a best man, two groomsmen and a groomswoman - gotta keep things different!

Now, without further adieu...

Leading the pack of groomsmen is none other than the Groom’s big brother, Jason. Jason is the proud father of Alyssa, Brandon’s enchanting niece. Jason is currently dating the lovely Angie (who the family just adores). Brandon and Jason can spend eons shooting the breeze and chatting in Brandon’s parents’ hot tub... Frankly, if you were to ask Brandon to define friendship he would tell you to that it is simple to define, just turn to his brother.

Brothers...

Sue is the next to be introduced and this would be where the “doll” comes in as Sue is one of the nicest people in the world... an absolute “doll” if you will. Sue loves sports, dogs (she is the proud mom of a pack of them!), cats (“Smokey, and the Bandit”, how cute is that? (For more information please reference http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0076729/ for more information) and is engaged to the delightful Terri. Brandon and Sue are roommates, but much more like family.

A Rose Between Two Thorns, or a Thorn Between Two Roses?

(Left to Right) Sue, Marie, and Terri

As previously mentioned in other posts, Landon joins the group as the proud new papa of the gang – 6 weeks and counting! Lanny is a banker by trade, but enjoys poker and scotch so perhaps he may have the potential ingredients for a gangster. Married for 1/20th of a century to Lorraine (AKA the Major-General of my Unit), Lanny has known Brandon since the four of us met at the “Chicken Chalet” and the infamous words “would you like dark meat or white meat?” were uttered. Tear...

The New Happy Family!

Lastly (as far as the groomsmen go) is someone who I introduced to y’all on Saturday – Amandeep. Deep joins our gang as the tallest member of the party and has the misfortune of having attended York University for his undergrad – this fact was a HUGE concern for me as being an alumni of UofT the steadily increasing number of York grads in our wedding party is reaching alarming numbers. Amandeep also has the mis (errr...cough) fortune of dating my lovely sister and is probably one of the smartest people I know (love you man).

Amandeep, Piper and Megs (What a Cute Trio)

Drawing up the rear of the male contingent is perhaps the shortest member of the wedding party (I’d have to measure my sister against him to know for sure!). This fellow has an obsession with Thomas Da Tank (sorry started slipping back into that whole gangsta’ thing from previous posts), is an older bro to Rhys, will soon be my nephew (officially that is!) and is the son of Brandon’s sister Meaghan – please give up a loud round of applause for the soon to be four year old Ring Bearer Extraordinaire (RBE) – Ryder!

This is an old picture (so he has grown a lot!) but the day was so much fun it had to be used... 

Meet Ryder our RBE and Chuckee Cheese Officianado

Now that the gang of groomspeople have been introduced (including our adorable RBE) it is time to introduce the remainder of Brandon’s posse...

Brandon is the off-shoot of John and Lorraine (AKA Mom and Dad) and has known them for pretty much all his life (please know I am a loser and I enjoy making the most obvious of statements). This coming September (aka the month of the wedding) John and Lorraine will be celebrating thirty years of marriage, thus making our day that much more special!

In Grandma Mode!  Lorraine is helping Rhys

Guys Will Be Guys...

(Left to Right) Jason, John and Brandon

Next is Brandon’s sister, Meaghan. Meaghan plays the role of older sister, female advisor and former butt kicking judo athlete. Meaghan is the proud mom of Ryder and Rhys and is currently studying to become a Montessori teacher. (PS While Rhys is too small to be in the wedding party we still love him and can’t wait until we can have a full fledged conversation with him... right now it is kind of one sided!).

Brandon looks like he is enjoying a BIG beer with his BIG sis

So that is the troop of “peeps” that comprise Brandon’s half of the team, but let’s face it, whether it is my “Unit” or Brandon’s gang of “Guys and Doll(s)” it doesn’t matter, because to both of us they represent the best friends anyone could ask for.

255 Days to Go!